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13 Ways to Manipulate a Narcissist Without Them Knowing

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Manipulating a narcissist has many similarities to the actions of the Brothers Grimm. beauty and the beast.

Trapped in unimaginable creatures, Belle stays true to herself and is quick-witted.

So are narcissistic relationships. Only the prince turns into a wild beast and is never happy after that. A locked castle could be your home.

Victims of narcissists are also prone to Stockholm Syndrome due to their traumatic bond.

You can break those ties without breaking your belief system.

What’s the best way to outsmart a narcissist?

Before we can know how to get a narcissist to do what they want, we need to understand the complexities of narcissism.

People diagnosed with Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) have an inflated ego and an excellent sense of self-importance. They thrive on the narcissistic supply they get from people who can’t see through masks.

Whether you’re trapped at a dinner party right next to a narcissist or stuck in a two-year relationship with a narcissist, the best way to maneuver is to keep the supply flowing.

  • provision of goods keep you in their grace.
  • to understand supply runs out quickly You will need more fuel.
  • don’t try to distract toward you.

Why Should You Manipulate a Narcissist?

For the same reason you can’t try to drown a fish, you need to learn how to manipulate a narcissist. We’re dealing with a different kind of creature that isn’t vulnerable to standard manipulation tactics.

Narcissists believe themselves to be mortal human gods and have mastered the art of manipulation.

A narcissist sees people as tools to prop up their grandiosity. They are incapable of feeling emotions and have no guilt triggers.

Threatening their ego (which happens to be very fragile) can cause them to suffer some negative consequences.

  • verbal bullying
  • physical abuse
  • reputation attack
  • antagonize family and friends
  • steal from you
  • years of emotionally destroying you

There’s a fine line between manipulating a narcissist and fighting fire. The goal of any narcissistic manipulation is to get out of it as unscathed as possible.

You are not trying to hurt them. you are trying to save yourself

How to Manipulate a Narcissist: 13 Tactics That Don’t Compromise Your Integrity

By the time you start looking for an escape hatch, you may have made a few mistakes along the way.

Stooping to those levels will always leave a bad taste in your mouth because you can experience emotions and guilt. increase.

1. Straighten your head (and heart)

You’re not trying to control the results, not manipulate them. Let go of the belief that you can change or fix them.

Ingrained behavior is so difficult that even trained psychiatrists spend up to ten years treating the disorder (because it cannot be cured). Still, therapy requires honesty and vulnerability. Narcissists rarely provide.

You are still a wonderful person, but please accept the fact that Narcissistic Personality Disorder cannot be cured.

2. Set boundaries in advance

A narcissist knows how to push all your buttons, so part of the game plan should be establishing boundaries. This is for myself more than the narcissist.

Like a boxer preparing for eight rounds, listen to the narcissist’s megalomania while being prepared to take passive-aggressive attacks without reacting. If you feel that your emotional walls are slipping, mentally imagine them coming back in no time.

3. Familiarize yourself with your exit strategy

Sometimes dealing with a narcissist requires a break. If you don’t plan ahead, the narcissist will assume you’re going to someone or something better, and there’s nothing better than them, right?

The strategy includes “Looks like you’ve finished your drink. I’ll go get another one for the two of us. Recognizing them as a priority, you are running away.

At home, you can say: “I know how much you loved Moulton’s Chocolate Cake at dinner the other night. I have a recipe for you.” A bonus if you like desserts or dishes that take longer to make so you have space.

Note: Be prepared for them not to criticize and react to your cooking. Just accept feedback.

4. Be authentic with compliments

Because you already know the narcissist, you rarely feel the need to tell them how great they are, but you should also celebrate the positive things they do.

Positive reinforcement and celebration of success can build a greater sense of self while showing that you support their careers and hobbies.

Everyone is good at something, and even narcissists need serious support when someone does something well.

5. Prepare to listen

Whether you’re listening to drama queen friends or cynical sisters, we’re already good at this.

Don’t cross your arms, roll your eyes, or show anger. Instead of offering solutions, offer support.

  • “You have a right to feel the way you do.”
  • “You must be really mad about it.”
  • “When you’re working hard, you don’t have to be this angry about your co-workers.”
  • “Your mother is always very strict with you.”

6. Remove “Ifs” ​​and “Buts”

Normal people want to hear solutions and constructive criticism. Narcissists are not normal. If you point out a flaw, misrepresentation, or inappropriate behavior, you have not provided any information to them. This can cause anger and irritation.

How To Manipulate A Couple Narcissist Looking At Paperwork In The Kitchen

Resist the temptation to say things like, “If they just stopped yelling,” or, “But it always happens when I drink.” In their minds, it is always others who are to blame.

7. Stabilize your heart rate

Use breathing techniques to keep your heart rate from rising when the narcissist approaches you. Even the best suppliers are not enough.

The trick with supply is that any type of supply will do. Not only do they want attention, they want to know that you are in control of your emotions.

If you keep the emotional impact flat on what they say, they may get angry and leave (for a short period of time or permanently) because they need another supply.

Other related articles

Think You Might Be a Narcissist? 15 Steps to Stop Narcissistic Behavior

27 Most Obvious Traits Of A Female Narcissist

Are Two Narcissists In A Relationship? 15 Reasons They Are Attracted To Each Other

8. Protect yourself from deep conversations

Narcissists create connections by pretending to be interested in people and by mimicking the actions of others. There is a tendency to

The narcissist will inevitably use this against you, so keep deep conversations to a minimum.

You don’t have to lie about your great upbringing when you go through hardships, but you don’t have to run away and share the time you were found by the police in the park.

9. Remove Diagnosis Arguments

In a world full of personality acronyms and Googled health issues, it’s tempting to say, “Hey, did you know you have 7 of the 9 traits of Narcissistic Personality Disorder?” Become.

Just as your doctor is a health expert and doesn’t need to give your opinion on a diagnosis, a narcissist doesn’t need to be told something is wrong. do you remember?

When you blame a narcissist, you are trying to shatter their facade. It encourages narcissistic anger, gaslighting, and silent treatment. increase.

10. Remove expectations

If you pay for one meal, don’t expect to pay for the next. don’t think

Stay true to your kind nature, but do it from a generous space that makes you feel good without expecting generosity. will be

11. Get help personally

Dealing with a narcissist is a delicate balance. Only a trained therapist can help. Talking negatively about a narcissist to a friend or family member may turn you back on them.

A loved one can also offer guidance for dealing with normal people, but they may not understand the complexities of a narcissist.

A private therapy session can help you cope and get out of a relationship without the typical emotional debris.

12. Create a visualization of the narcissist

Some of the most notorious narcissists in history include Hitler, Ted Bundy and Bernie Madoff. Narcissism is a hop, skip, jump to a sociopath.

As they hurt us, we can see the monsters crumbling and disintegrating before our very eyes.

A man drives while his female passenger is fussing over how to manipulate a narcissist

Train yourself to see monsters for what they are – weak, spineless, emotionless creatures that never truly experience love or intimacy. Create visions of pitiful creatures that are weak and panting.

Having these strong boundaries (see #2) allows you to better offer much-needed sympathy and support while avoiding feeling sorry for them.

13. Take them where they’re already going

A narcissist has a three-step cycle.

  • idealization: They build illusions of who they are and who they are around them. This includes love-bombing Supply his target (you).
  • depreciate: They slowly destroy the person’s self-esteem, isolate them, and make them dependent on the narcissist.
  • destruction: When the supply runs out or the job is done, the narcissist removes the person in a glorious flame or by disappearing from the face of the earth.

Lean into it because you know discard is coming. Care must be taken not to provoke aggression or anger. Agree with them when they say you are not right for them. Do not ask for closure. let them go.

how to manipulate a narcissist

final thoughts

At this point you might ask: “Am I enabling the narcissist by doing these things?” that’s a valid question.

Remember, you are using these manipulations to safely break free from narcissistic anger and narcissists. I didn’t make it.

If the narcissist is an inevitable parent, child, or co-worker, you are learning tactics to protect your sanity and reputation. but still play the game.

Are there narcissists in your life? Find out in this post how to manipulate a narcissist without compromising your integrity.

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