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“No one can hurt me without my permission.”
mahatma gandhi
“Do what you think is right in your heart, because you will be criticized anyway. If you do, you will be cursed.
Eleanor Roosevelt
very common problem lower self esteem Or, it’s taking things too personally that can build up so much anger that it starts to steam out of your ears.
So you may try to thicken your skin to wash away criticism, negativity, and verbal aggression.
But that is easier said than done.
In this week’s article, I want to share six habits that, at least most of the time, really work for me and help me reduce stress, anger and hurt in my life.
I hope they are useful for you too.
1. Take a breath.
Focus on breathing for a minute or two (or a few breaths if that’s all the time).
Focus only on the air going in and out of your nose. nothing else.
This simple exercise will help calm your mind and body a little.
It helps create a little space between yourself and what just happened. That way, you’re less likely to get a knee-jerk reaction or, for example, verbally criticize the other person.
Approaching things in this way makes it easier for you to handle situations in the way that you deeply desire.
2. Get an explanation.
Don’t jump to conclusions based on something you may have just misunderstood. As a result, you don’t let anger drag you down and feel sorry for yourself.
Instead, ask questions if possible to help clarify the other person’s intentions a little.
And if possible, explain how his words make you feel. You may not even notice that you gave it.
3. Realize that it’s not all about you.
It’s all too easy to assume that the criticism and verbal attacks you receive are about you and what you’ve done.
But it could simply be that the other person is having a bad day, week, or year.
And they release pent-up emotions and tensions on you who are simply in the wrong place at the wrong time.
Remember this when you find yourself in a situation where you are likely to take things personally.
4. Please speak.
When something gets under your skin and you start taking it personally, it can lead you into a downward spiral that sinks your ever-growing self-esteem.
Break it down or prevent it by revealing what happened. Talk to someone close to you and ask your friend to share her perspective on what happened.
Maybe she knows something about how the person who verbally attacked you is going through a difficult time.
Or she can just listen and through that help you sort things out for yourself and put yourself in a more sober perspective on what happened.
5. Ask yourself: Is there anything here that can actually help me?
This can be a difficult question to ask yourself. And it doesn’t always lead to anything.
But you can empower yourself sometimes by asking for it.
Whatever the criticism, you can find one or more steps you can take to improve. You can start moving forward again and regain confidence in yourself and what you can do.
Instead of getting stuck doing nothing or replaying what happened over and over in your head.
This is especially helpful if it’s the 5th or 10th time you’ve heard the same thing from someone. Then there might be something here that you want to work on (even if it’s not that fun to face).
6. Increase self-esteem.
i found it I have learned to improve and maintain my self-esteem Things don’t get under my skin often. I don’t take them personally and maintain a healthier perspective and distance.
So they bounce faster and don’t drag out my days and weeks.
One of the easiest ways to improve your self-esteem starting today is to be kind to those around you.
you can:
- Please help them in some way.
- Ask a friend when you need help finding a better perspective.
- Give a genuine compliment.
- Encourage when most of their world may be discouraged.
How you treat others is how they treat you in the long run.
And, more importantly for self-esteem, when we are kind to others, we tend to treat and think of ourselves more kindly.