“What man really needs is not tensionlessness, but striving and striving towards a worthy goal, a freely chosen task.” ~ Viktor Frankl
A few years ago, I was sitting in a small mountain cottage writing a new novel. It was a cold, dark February afternoon. So, first, I was pleasantly surprised when I saw something bright glowing behind me. I thought it was the sun out. However, when I turned around, I realized that the verandah was on fire.
Before I knew what was going on, I was standing in my slippers in the snow, looking back at the entrance and facade completely engulfed in flames.
It was like a near-death experience. My mind quickly cataloged everything that was in the now burning shack—almost all of my personal belongings. But in that moment I realized that nothing mattered more than the manuscript I was working on.
A few hours later, the fire brigade left, and after seeing the burnt-out ruins of my former home, I finally got in the car with my Border Collie, Marius. (The car keys were nothing short of a miracle.)
I was on my way to my mother’s house, nearly 160 miles away, where I thought about crashing, crying, getting drunk, whatever. Under these circumstances, all sorts of self-care seemed justified, including chocolate and drug indulgence and hefty allowances for self-pity.
Luckily, it struck me that meditation or self-hypnosis might be a good idea too. And when I tried it, it immediately gave me a deeper intuition of what to do.
The voice of my inner wisdom (or, if you want to call it my Higher Self, who has access to cosmic intelligence) has taught me some rules to follow in order to maintain a high state of mind despite the misfortunes that have occurred. gave me
The rules given to me are:
- Do not consume alcohol under any circumstances.
- Eat a vegan, fresh fruit and vegetable based diet. Cut out all the sugar. Your system is in shock and cannot remove the toxins without further damage.
- Go to the gym every day and work out vigorously for an hour. Doing so releases stress hormones and makes you stronger.
- Forget about home for now. Live as simply as possible and focus on the projects that bring you the best energy and the greatest hope for the future. That is, writing novels. Make it a priority and regularly take the time to pay attention and protect the space in which it is done.
Indeed, it was a tough language of love. Isn’t it natural to seek solace and distraction in moments of great crisis, loss, or trauma? I will continue to thank you. Otherwise, it would be easy to fall into a dark pit of self-pity, victimhood, and destructive patterns.
in Andersen’s fairy tales girl selling matchesOrphans are trying to make a living by selling matches on the street. It was winter and she was suffering from freezing cold, so she gave in to her temptation to light a match to warm her hands.
At the moment of ignition, she feels like she’s back in her late grandmother’s living room, cozy with fireplaces, roast dinners, and a glowing Christmas tree. But her short-term escape comes at a price. She becomes obsessed with lighting matches. Ultimately, she wastes all her goods and dies. Similarly, we too can be tempted to succumb to the temptation of temporary comfort, depleting all our resources and slowly depleting ourselves.
But there is a high way out of the crisis. Etymologically, the word is crisis dates back to ancient greece κρίσις, It means decision.In moments of great danger, loss or threat, we must focus our attention and see what really matters.
It was the moment I stood in the snow and watched my house burn that made me realize what was most important to me. Even before that, I had taken writing seriously, but this crisis was the first time I learned to prioritize my soul’s calling against all odds.
The essential questions about decisions arising from crises are:
Are we let our past traumas dictate our lives, or do we have strong enough visions of the future to propel us forward?
Once I was at a conference on consciousness, where a very interesting idea was put forward.
many of us have heard entropy: The tendency of closed physical systems to advance over time, increasing the level of chaos. (For example, an ice cube is heated to liquid water (entropy increases because the molecules can move more freely) and then boils (because the molecules in the vapor move around more randomly).
But it is less argued that, as a result of the mathematical equation, there must also be a force opposing it.
This reaction force is called Syntropy. It works because of the law of symmetry backwards Over time the level of harmony will increase.
If entropy governs physical (inanimate) systems, then syntropy must apply to consciousness (life) as well, and thus it must be (retroactively) triggered by the future in some strange and mysterious way. It is suggested that it must be.
Intrigued, but first, this sounded very sci-fi to me…
But when I started thinking about it more deeply, I realized how much practical truth there was in this. Psychologically, the future can indeed have a tremendous harmonizing and organizing effect on our present lives.
For example, consider an athlete who spends several hours a day wading up and down a pool. When I ask them why they do that, they say it’s because they’re training for the Olympics. The Olympic Games are futurebut it gives cause Swimmers Currently Follow an organized and structured training regime instead of just hanging out all day.
The life-saving effect of having worthwhile future goals has been documented since the early days of psychology.
world renowned psychotherapist Victor Frankl While imprisoned in a Nazi concentration camp, he observed his comrades in distress. He then taught that those who have a purpose to stay alive (say, a study or manuscript to complete, or a relationship to rekindle) are also those who are most likely to survive under such dire circumstances. rice field.
Having worked with abused women for years, I have made similar observations. Hypnotherapy includes a series of techniques such as: future course of life, It gives their subconscious a chance to explore an alternate future. In one exercise, women were asked to imagine that a miracle happened overnight and they are now waking up in their best future.
Surprisingly, the people most resistant to change were the unimaginable. Any A future day different from their current reality. After all, even more important than healing past trauma is teach their brains to imagine new futures.
We have to learn that if we want to take a positive path out of crisis. It means imagining your future in the best possible way. It starts by focusing on the single thing in life that you feel is most worthwhile and worth pursuing, rather than the trauma, the pain, or the past. Having found it, our worthy goals will serve as towers of light for us to safely sail into the future, no matter how uncertain the current situation.
And you may ask what my most worthy goal is. Realize, as Viktor Frankl said, that in the end it’s not about us to ask, it’s about us in life. And he can answer his life only by answering about his own life. To life he can only respond by taking responsibility. ”
what is your best answer?