Editor’s Note: This is a guest post from David Nurse.
Knowing and doing are closely related but not the same thing.
Enrolling in a tidy course and becoming a “sponge of the simple life” is not the same as rolling up your sleeves and mercilessly throwing away your belongings.
So the problem becomes: How do you close the gap? How do you take the “know-how” and put it into action?
By revealing obstacles.
The way we take action is to first realize it’s not, and then gain a deeper understanding of why.
Indeed, we can assume that we did not act because we had too little time or insufficient resources.
The truth is, only 8% of people achieve their dreams in life. 8 percent. If not, he is 92%.
And the only thing stopping you from doing that is…well, you.
From living in her parents’ recliner after blindly unemployed to witnessing the life-changing repercussions of overcoming her own behavioral disorder, one of the top 50 motivational speakers in the world. I felt the need to help others do the same until I was chosen by people.
Regardless of your role in life, you are called to act. Don’t just think about living, live your life. The dreams you have, such as living in a neat house, changing jobs, or writing a book, are yours for a reason. Now is the time to make it happen.
in my new book do itI discuss nine reasons (or behavior archetypes) that people don’t take action, and how to overcome these personal obstacles.
Here are four reasons why we don’t act (and what to do about them).
1. Allodoxaphobic
Allodoxaphobia is the fear of other people’s opinions. Research shows that an irrational fear of being ridiculed begins in childhood. Being ridiculed in elementary school for bringing unpopular toys to class, being teased in high school for driving his parents’ battered station wagon, and being ridiculed for proposing new theories in college classes. or All of these experiences are future triggers for allodoxaphobia and influence whether you take action today.
Think how much better your world would be if you didn’t care what other people thought. If I raise my voice, will they laugh at me?What if I don’t like this IG post of her?I want this mug she bought me What would my friend think if I donated?
Tools to overcome allodoxaphobia: Create a personal mantra.
Your personal mantra is the funnel that defines who you are. you Control your life story, not other people’s opinions. Think about your strongest qualities, your favorite words, the type of person you want to be with. Then use this to create a mantra.
My motto is “Creating an Enthusiastic and Encouraging Environment”. I want to smear this mantra into my brain and enter every room, so I keep this mantra on my phone’s lock screen. A personal mantra allows you to choose your own inner story, shape your own perspective, and drown out the nonsense of others that prevents you from acting.
2. Perfectionist
Perfectionism, which often stems from childhood events, has been amplified by our culture. Society’s pressure to project a false version of yourself, your goals, and your life is creating unrealistic expectations. If you were there right now, you’d be hard-pressed to find a post by someone exposing all the failures, mishaps, and heartbreaks behind their recent successes.
Logging on and scrolling through a barrage of sophisticated images can leave you frustrated and frustrated. If your goal is a minimalist lifestyle, you may be tempted to give up completely because you equate minimalism with a perfectly curated home. considered and left paralyzed.
Tools to overcome perfectionism: 90% rule.
Think of the most difficult thing on your schedule today or this week. What if we consider that “challenging thing” as a challenge that has already been overcome? Do you feel more peaceful and confident about it? I would imagine so. because you have already achieved it.
Too often, the pressure we put on ourselves causes us to work too hard and not achieve our goals. Write “I have already won the game” on a piece of paper. Bonus points if you put this paper on your bedstand or tape it to the ceiling right above your bed (it’s the first thing you see when you wake up every morning!).
you have already won the game. Please take a deep breath. You don’t have to press 100% all the time. how free is that? Now you can move freely.
3. Distraction
Research shows that we spend about 47% of our waking hours “distracted” or distracted. Distraction has become such a natural experience that we don’t realize it’s getting in the way. Indeed, the causes of an overly distracted life can be external. You can blame the 3.04 million apps on your phone, the 667,865 local restaurants, and the 532 channels you can watch, not to mention 64 different streaming services.
But let’s be honest, distractions are often internal. We keep ourselves mentally busy looking for distractions so we can avoid facing big questions like whether or not we are truly living a meaningful life.
Tools to overcome distraction: Benefits of distraction.
Distractions are all around us if we want to. But there are also ample opportunities to take advantage of what others see as distractions. List your distractions on the left and the most important people you want to spend time with/what you want to accomplish on the right. pull and tie them together.
For example:
Distractions: I have three young children.
Goal: Clean up one room in a month.
Distraction Benefits: Set up any room you want organized with donations, trash, and storage bins. Then play hide-and-seek with the kids for 20 minutes a day. While they’re hiding, you’ll spend an inordinate amount of time finding them, using that time to organize drawers and cupboards and discarding items as you play.
Take action by bridging distractions to your goals.
4. The Burned
Burning on past events puts you in “what if” mode. In your last attempt to declutter your home, you’ve completely retreated and succumbed to pointless purchases. Why try to be a minimalist again? I spent years building a startup that only went bankrupt. Why try to build another business again?
The root of what-if is fear. But I’m here to suggest a question that scares you even more. What if you miss the chance to go all out for your passion? you live with regret
Tools to overcome burns: Reverse alter ego.
Creating a reverse alter-ego name can help you realize that your past self is not who you are now. Recruitment of alter ego self distancing, gives us room to reconfigure the situation. Kobe Bryant’s on-court alter ego was the Black Mamba. Beyoncé’s stage alter ego is Sasha Fierce. Mine is Little Davy.
Saying it out loud makes me laugh and it reminds me of myself when I was younger, not now. I also use Little Davy when I think about mistakes I made years ago and when my life got burned. Little Davy may have past traumas and setbacks, but not David. not me. Not here, not now. I am a different person now and can take action regardless of my past.
By identifying the reasons for inaction and learning the tools to overcome them, you can move from knowing to doing and giving yourself permission to truly live.You can read more about these four action archetypes (and five others) here Do It: The Power to Change Your Life.
Happiness is what we all seek, fulfillment is the key to happiness, and action is the means to get you there.
Why not do something that fills you up? Please take action. Your life and the lives of those around you just get better.
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David Nurse Bestselling author, Top 50 motivational speaker (named by Real Leaders), and David Nurse Show podcast host. He has worked with more than 150 of his NBA players, coaches, CEOs and Hollywood actors to help them change their mindsets to succeed at the highest level. his third book, Do It: The Power to Change Your Lifereleased on May 2nd.
