Frankly, men and women are different like chalk and cheese. What makes you tick as a woman may be the very thing that makes your husband’s skin crawl. Your emotional needs may sound strange to your spouse, and vice versa. There will be Your job, then, is to try to understand what keeps your spouse’s boat afloat – learn their love language and speak it fluently.
in his book his needs her needs Willard F. Hurley Jr. believes that our inability to meet each other’s emotional needs stems from our ignorance of those needs, not our selfish unwillingness to consider them. . This means that unless you are deliberately investigating and interrogating your spouse, you may unknowingly take actions that offend your spouse. As a wife, below are her six ways she may be unknowingly hurting her husband.
1. Criticize him and mother him
As a wife, you may enjoy your role as a mother hen to T. Enjoys the privilege of ruling the roost. but. Do you bundle your husband with your children when giving directions? Do you often redirect, criticize, correct, criticize, or disagree with your husband? You fall into the trap of mothering your husband. They are constantly trying to poke holes in their husband’s opinions and actions and try to steer him in a different direction.
This makes the husband feel neglected, disrespected and controlled. This can also hurt their self-esteem, damage their trust, and make them bitter and angry.Making her husband a mother makes her husband defensive and withdraws into his own shell. increase. However, this does not mean that you cannot have a different opinion than your husband. In marriage, conflicts and differences in character are guaranteed. But when voicing your opinion, be respectful of her and avoid attacking her husband’s character. Avoid sounding like his mother or if you caught his hand in a cookie jar.
2. Give him the quiet treatment
Joe barges into the living room, battered to the bone and feeling awful for being late. His wife was nowhere to be seen, so he ran upstairs to the bedroom and found her lying on the bed reading her book, ready to greet her and strike up a conversation. His attempt to do so hit a skid. She didn’t speak to him, she just looked at him. He walked away dejected, wondering what he had done wrong (besides his coming home late).
It is not uncommon for wives to remain silent when their husbands are upset about something. But this is toxic, abusive and unhealthy for any relationship.It takes her two hours to make a tango. It is unfair to leave her husband groping in the dark without realizing his mistake. Remember that your husband is not a mind reader.He will not be able to decipher your frustrations if you do not communicate effectively.
Psychologists say people who use silence therapy aim to control the other person in order to manipulate them. Rejected and hurt. You give them the impression that you don’t care about the health of your marriage. The silent treatment also means refusing proper communication in which the marriage cannot thrive.
The scriptures are full of warnings for proper communication in relationships.of Amos 3:3, I read that two people cannot walk together unless they agree. This means that communication is the backbone of any successful relationship. Furthermore, Paul exhorted the Ephesian church not to let the sun set on their wrath (Ephesians 4:26). This means that quarrels and disputes between them must be resolved quickly.
Paul also called on believers to pursue peace with all people (Hebrews 12:14). Honestly, we are keen to make amends to everyone but our spouses. We want to hold grudges against our spouses, but they are the most important people in our lives. As a wife, if you like to treat your husband quietly, listen to God’s instructions. Choose to lean in and accept communication.
3. Indifference to sexual intimacy
Let’s face it; sex is a big deal for most men. It ranks high among their needs. Conversely, most women need to feel an emotional connection with their husband before thinking about intimacy. They need to feel affection and love first. Sex becomes a way of expressing the deep connection they feel.
When couples have not learned to serve each other’s primary needs, there is usually a sexual imbalance. Wives are often indifferent to intimate relationships, while husbands yearn for the same It may look like When a husband feels that his wife is begging him for sex, it hurts his self-confidence and self-esteem. I want to When their wives show indifference, they feel small and incompetent, and this causes them immeasurable pain.
If you feel indifferent to sexual intimacy as a wife, aim to find the root of the problem. Let her husband know how to rekindle your interest.
4. Compare him
“Jane’s husband never misses the children’s school assemblies. I wish you were like him!” Sally muttered to her husband in a moment of rage. In return, Steve was burned down. He felt worthless and unappreciated. He worked hard every day so that his family could be well fed. “Doesn’t she appreciate my efforts?” he asked himself.
Stacking your husband against another person is another surefire way to hurt him. Your husband feels rejected and frustrated. Moreover, when you compare husbands, you forget about their good qualities as you focus on their weaknesses. This is totally unfair because you have weaknesses too. You won’t like it if your husband compares you to other women.
5. Don’t admire him, don’t appreciate him
Did you know that most men thrive on admiration and that means the world they get from their wives? Honest admiration for your husband will boost his confidence and motivate him to take on the world. Men are competitive and tend to derive value from what they do. Therefore, you should know that your wife will notice and appreciate how you are doing for your family. They need a pat on the back all the time.
If you don’t appreciate your husband and applaud his achievements, he may become irritated and gradually lose the enthusiasm to do your best. , watch him spread his wings even further.
6. Nagging him
So you asked your husband to fix a leaking faucet last weekend, but he’s not used to it. Is it your mission to badger until he gets it done? Here’s the truth, men all over the world hate nagging. Persistence means persistently causing trouble or finding fault with someone. It happens when the nagging person doesn’t believe the other person has good intentions or can effectively perform the task. It reflects the lack of communication and impatience caused by persistent people.
Women are more likely to be nagging because they are primarily responsible for running the household. In their quest to control the roost, they end up trying to control their children and husbands. Wise King Solomon noted that it was better to live in the corner of the roof than in a house with a contentious woman (Proverbs 21:9).
Nagging your husband will make him want to run away for peace. Instead, you need to have proper communication and trust your husband to have good intentions. Stop nagging and communicate politely with your husband.
Related:
6 Ways You’re Unwittingly Hurt Your Wife
Photo credit: ©Getty Images/Vadym Pastukh
