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3 Times Jesus Said No to People-Pleasing

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Originally, I was planning to attend the conference. Eventually, it was called “very important” and I was urged to attend. This meeting was important, but I felt the Lord telling me that my presence there was not important. I felt him reminding me to stay in my lane and make time for the other projects he gave me.

This meant I had to say no…

As a convalescent, I couldn’t help but be nervous. I hate disappointing people, and sometimes I worry about what other people will think if I decline a request. When it came time to inform the meeting leader that I would not be attending, the earlier fear returned. Or am I selfish? Or non-mental?

But in the midst of these worries, I stopped and remembered an important truth. The ability to choose which requests to accept is essential to achieving my objectives. But if there’s something I can strategically say no to, I’ll leave space to say yes to what’s most important: what I know without a doubt that God wants me to focus. make.

i love you so much i can say no

We tend to equate saying yes with being “loving” and saying no with being “unloving,” but in reality, refusing a request is not necessarily unloving. In fact, when it paves the way for obedience and enables us to fulfill our individual callings, it is the most loving and godly thing we can do.

Just look at Jesus. He was the most affectionate man to walk the earth, but he did not please people. He also understood that if he were to fulfill his mission to redeem humanity, the ultimate expression of love, he must not be dominated by the expectations of others. He is fully committed to following His Father’s leadership, and if anyone asks him to contradict what His Father wants, he simply chooses not to do so. bottom.

example of jesus

Choosing not to follow the wishes of others can be stressful, but contemplating the example of yes can give you the courage you need to act deliberately with yes and no. .

how about you Do you find it difficult to say no too? Does the prospect of refusing an invitation make your stomach thump like a fish caught in a fishing line? If so, Jesus willingly refused a request, even if it meant making others uncomfortable I suggest that you consider some of the passages of Scripture that emphasize that.

T.There are many such passages in the Gospels, but I will mention three to start with. We hope they encourage and inspire you too!

“As Jesus was speaking to the crowd, his mother and brothers stood outside and asked him to speak. Someone said to him, ‘Your mother and your brothers were standing outside. , I would like to speak to you.” Jesus asked, “Who is my mother?” who is my brother Then he pointed to his disciples and said, “Look, these are my mother and brothers. Whoever does the will of the Heavenly Father is my brother, sister and mother.” )!

Here we see Jesus’ mother and brothers demanding, “Come out and talk to us.” But Jesus did not immediately jump up and run to his family. Instead, he continued doing what he knew he should have done in the moment: teaching.

Well, it’s possible he went to them right after making “Who’s My Mother?” statement. However, as Mark revealed that shortly before this incident, his family thought he was “out of his mind” (3:21, NLT) and tried to take him home. It is possible that they were again trying to take him away, and Jesus, knowing their intentions, refused to cooperate. In any case, it is clear that he did not immediately comply with their request. His focus never wavered even with interruptions.

This does not mean that Jesus did not care about his family. On the contrary, he must have loved his family very much. But at the time of this particular question, his followers needed his attention.His family may have viewed his delay as an inconvenience, but Jesus knew that their request was for him. I did not allow it to deviate from my current priorities.

Parents and siblings also call us (or perhaps text in modern times). But sometimes we try our best to do what Jesus did.

“A man named Lazarus was ill. He lived in Bethany with his sisters Mary and Martha…the two sisters sent a message to Jesus. But when Jesus heard it, he said, ‘Lazarus No, it came about for the glory of God, that the Son of God might be glorified from now on.So Jesus loved Martha, Mary, and Lazarus, but he loved Martha, Mary and Lazarus. He stayed there for two days, and finally said to his disciples, ‘Let’s go back to Judea'” (NLT).

Here Jesus received a message from his friends Mary and Martha. They didn’t explicitly ask Jesus to come, but they said, “Your dear friend is very sick.” They knew that Jesus was a healer. They also knew that if Jesus came, Lazarus would be restored. They probably thought Jesus would show up at their home shortly after receiving the message. We are some of Jesus’ best friends. Doesn’t that mean anything? Can’t he make an effort for us? doesn’t he love us?

Jesus would have known what Mary and Martha expected of him. Yet I never let fear of what people think of me dictate my actions. Jesus knew that God had something better in store for him, and he was more willing to risk being misunderstood than to deviate from his Father’s instructions.

How often do we comply with requests out of fear of hurting someone’s feelings, or out of fear that they will see us as “unloved”? I don’t mean to say that, like Jesus, sometimes doing the things that honor God the most, even if it makes others uncomfortable or puts us in danger, It means that you must be willing to “say no”. criticism.

“One day the Pharisees and Sadducees came to test Jesus and demanded that he be shown a miraculous sign from heaven to prove his authority. means bad weather all day long.” You know how to interpret the signs of the weather in the sky, but you do not know how to interpret the signs of the hours! but the only sign I will give them is the sign of the prophet Jonah. Then Jesus left them and went away” (NLT).

In this episode, the religious leaders who questioned Jesus confronted him and “demanded” a sign to prove who he was. But Jesus felt no need to prove himself, nor did he give in to social pressure. Confident in his identity and devoted to doing only what he saw his father doing, he easily said no to pleasing people.John 5:19-20). And apparently, in this case, his father had not instructed him to perform the signs. So, after calling them wicked and denying their demands, Jesus simply removed himself from the situation. The Living Bible says this.

That’s… a bit rude. But remember, Jesus was love incarnate. And God believes that the most loving thing to do in such a situation is to refuse their demand for evidence and then move on to something else, to make His time more productive. Did you know?

As painful as it may be to admit, sometimes the reason for saying yes has more to do with the desire to be seen in a positive light than with the genuine desire to do good. How good it would be to obey, ignore the hype of skeptics, and turn our attention to more productive endeavors! Because when God knows who we are, we don’t need anyone else’s approval.

please god

Remember that meeting I was talking about earlier? I felt sick when I was writing the sentence to inform the leader that I would not be attending. But as soon as I hit send, I felt confirmation that I had done the right thing. Yes, they could have been disappointed when they read my message. They could have thought I was irresponsible or unspiritual. But the bottom line was that I was doing my best to do what Jesus did. It was just what Jesus saw the Father doing. It was nothing more and nothing less. And no matter how wonderful it is when people are pleased with me, pleasing them is not worth the price of disappointing God.

Saying no comes at a price, but it’s really a gift. Without the communication of doing nothing, our lives become like rudderless ships subject to the whims of those around us. But saying no wisely can steer the boat of life toward the goals and specific good work God has called for each of us.

May we find the strength to follow the guidance of the Holy Spirit as we meditate on the example of Jesus. Whether people praise or condemn your choices, you can be sure that you are pleasing your Heavenly Father!

Photo credit: ©GettyImages/ginosphotos

Karina Alanson is a former professional counselor turned writer and artist passionate about helping women live purposefully and grow in their relationship with God. She lives in the subarctic town of Fairbanks, Alaska, and enjoys scenic drives, skiing, snowshoeing, and reading by the fireplace with her husband.visit carinaalanson.com To connect with Carina and get your free journaling workbook, How Can You Know If a Desire Is From God? 5 Questions to Help You Decide, and other resources for purposeful living. You can also connect with her on Instagram @carinaalanson and on facebook @carinaalanson.

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