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5 Christlike Ways to Handle Disagreements Part 2

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My goal was never to argue with my family. Far from it. But when the conversation turned to religion and the salvation of his Hindu family, I could not remain silent. But the conversation went from kind and receptive to acerbic and sour.

Can we have Christlike disagreements and avoid letting our emotions take the path of destruction? As humans, our emotions are with us wherever we go. We can’t separate ourselves from them, but we can give ourselves time to process them and ask ourselves, “Is this really true?” And “Am I being guided by unresolved hurts or am I being guided by love?” Caused by true love.

Disagreements are not unscriptural. We often find Jesus disagreeing with people in the Bible. The problem arises when we are guided by our own opinions rather than by the Holy Spirit.

Here are five Christlike ways to handle disagreements.

1. Ask God to take control of the conversation

I often do this even when I’m not in the middle of a disagreement. If someone asks me a difficult question about the Bible or God, I always want to be guided by the Spirit and sound Bible truth. It is amazing to be able to say a simple prayer, “Please guide me.” In doing so, we acknowledge that although our flesh is weak, our spirit is glad. (Matthew 26:41)

We may not be able to say the right words in the midst of disagreements, but God will. And when His Spirit guides the conversation, we can be confident that we can show others the best version of ourselves.

2. Ask yourself, “Do I love this person?”

My pastor once told a story about an administrative assistant he had a bad time with. He was very young then and was banging his head on some issues. He finds a particular poem to use to end her argument once and for all, but on his way to her lady’s office, the Spirit stops him and says, “You love her.” Are you?” I asked. He knew if he was being completely honest, but the answer was no. A simple question and a redirect made him realize that his corrections were unfounded if not rooted in love.

Many of us are familiar with the next verse in Ephesians, but forget the love part.

“Instead, we speak the truth with love, growing more and more like Christ, who is the head of the church, which is the body of Christ in every way.” Ephesians 4:15 NLTs

Great things happen when you are guided by love for Christ and His Church instead of selfish pride. The following scriptures help us understand what God wants for each of us.

“He fits his whole body perfectly. Each part does its own special job, so it helps other parts grow, and the whole body is healthy, growing, and full of love.” Ephesians 4:16 NLTs

3. Guided by a desire to understand

Have you ever been around people who just want to hear you talk? I know, but if our only concern is to be the loudest voice in the room, we probably miss the opportunity to see and understand God’s people. Because of their concern for being known, they overlook other people who really want to be heard and cared for.

If you feel like letting your opinion sway you instead of loving and caring for the other person, take a moment to pause. The Holy Spirit is always willing to help us when we are in trouble and gives us the patience and understanding that we lack.

James speaks of the fact that none of us have wisdom and understanding other than the Lord, and encourages us to turn our hearts to God and act in humility rather than our own selfish motives. increase.

“Who is wise and understanding among you? Let them be shown by their good lives, by their deeds of humility that come from wisdom. If you harbor intense envy or selfish ambition, do not boast about it or deny the truth.” James 3:13-14 NIV

4. Remember it’s not our job to “fix” other people

We are often deluded by the idea that we can persuade people to follow God. I think that if we dig our points into their heads with enough sound reasoning and determination, they’ll change their ways. But we don’t see this happening in the Gospels. . It is a miracle for someone to experience the utterly unreasonable grace and mercy of Jesus every time life changes.

The Holy Spirit is at work to convince the heart and make the prodigal repentant. We fall short when we try to be the Holy Spirit instead of simply trying to be in total submission to Him. Often times, we are ruled by our bodies and pride, and those we try to persuade are repelled rather than attracted to the throne of grace.

Paul reminds us of the reasons that draw people to God. roman 2and contrary to what we sometimes think, it does not discuss:

“Or do you despise His riches of kindness, patience, and patience, not realizing that God’s kindness is meant to lead you to repentance?” Romans 2:4 NIV

5. Remember, Others were Created in God’s Image

When you see someone stamped with the seal of God, it is difficult to speak harshly to that person. And whether the person is a believer or not, she was created in God’s image. All our interactions must be guided by this knowledge.

Some have said that when Jesus directed his earthly ministry, “You are wrong, you are wrong, and you are wrong. Come, follow me.” Something inside them comes alive when you remind people of what they have. They are transformed because the Spirit awakens them to the fact that they are sons and daughters, and their desire for the old way of life fades.

Not all disagreements with others are about God or the Bible, but these disagreements seem to stir our emotions the most. This is because we care deeply about our faith and beliefs. But when we disagree, don’t forget to let God lead the conversation. Shouldn’t be on the dining table. Let us remember the price he paid for each of us. And let us remember that even in the darkest moments of betrayal, he cried out, “Father, forgive them.” (Luke 23:34)

Click here to check out Part 1.

Photo credit: ©Getty Images/fizkes

Abbie McDonald Headshot

Abby Macdonald is a writing coach, Shift: Shifting Our Focus to Seeing God’s PresenceHer mission is to empower women to seek God and share their faith with courage in the midst of life’s turmoil. and her work has been featured in numerous publications.she can connect with her abby website Here you can get free worship playlists and shift your focus to God.You can also connect with Abby at Instagram.

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