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Can I Date a Nonbeliever?

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I hope the answer is “yes”.

Don’t get me wrong. The man who proposed to me and then married me was not just a follower of Christ. John also exemplifies the love chapter. 1 Corinthians 13, On a daily basis. Get to know my husband better. Then you’ll see how the above description applies to him like a tailored suit. After all, if John wasn’t a Christian, I wouldn’t have said yes.

Yet I’m struggling here to see if there are any loopholes that allow dating non-believers. This is partly because I don’t want to speak ill of Christians and Christianity any more. But most of all, I don’t want anyone to mistake God for the grumpy Killjoy.

At the same time, I lie to you to no avail. So can we talk about this? One tip for reading this article is to keep an open mind. (Especially if you’re already dating an unbeliever.) Consider why you might consider relaxing your standards by dating anyone.

1. Compromise

As God’s people, we are set apart for His use (1 Peter 2:9). Because of this, God has drawn boundaries about who we can marry. “Don’t be yoke to unbelievers and inequalities. What partnership can justice have with lawlessness? What fellowship can light have with darkness?”2 Corinthians 6:14ISVs).

Dating is meant to act as a precursor to marriage. Therefore, dating an unbeliever means acknowledging the possibility of spending the rest of your life with someone who does not share your faith.

It’s a dangerous business.

As Jesus said, “If you were to give your life for all the wealth and power in this world, what would it do you? And more to you than your soul. What is it worth?” (Matthew 16:26TPT).

Compromises carry significant risks. Think things through before undermining your beliefs by dating outside the confines of the Bible.

2. nothing serious

But maybe you’re just having fun. Maybe you’re just not ready to settle down and are just at the market for free food. make out. If your way of thinking is otherwise, what harm is there in dating a nonbeliever?

many. We all influence each other, so even if you start out dating with a pure heart, dating someone who isn’t a believer can get you swayed by that person’s way of thinking.

The Living Bible says: “Listen to them and you will start behaving like them.”1 Corinthians 15:33).

Moreover, those who give little or no regard to God’s Word may wholeheartedly welcome unwholesome and destructive activities. After all, the Bible serves as our compass for what is enlightening and what is not (1 Corinthians 10:23), non-Christians do not always see it this way.

A non-believer may accept everything as fair game regardless of how it affects you. For example, what if your non-Christian date wants to end a sexual night? Force you to give up your moral convictions?

Do you hold back your conscience and sins for dating?

3. Loneliness

Are you feeling lonely? You are not alone. Post-pandemic, 58% of American girlfriends agree with you.

But if loneliness drives you to date anyone, think twice. The Merriam-Webster Dictionary defines dating as “a usually romantic, social arrangement for meeting someone.” However, if your goal is to cure loneliness, you don’t need a romantic atmosphere. Add romance to it and you’re in for trouble, especially if the other person isn’t a believer. At best, your heart will break, and at worst, you may lose faith.

You can also enjoy a meal or a movie with someone. All while keeping things strictly platonic.

4. Evangelist date

Maybe the person you’ve been dating isn’t just a strong-willed person, but a caring person. What if they did not confess Christ? You can evangelize them while dating. right?

I have a cousin who has followed this trajectory. That love story could certainly pay off this route. But for every successful date with an evangelist, there are more stories of Christians who lost their faith after dating nonbelievers. In one case, a devout atheist marries a Christian woman and both retain their worldviews, but their children and grandchildren are agnostic.

After all, it’s for the sake of the next generation that dating unbelievers is discouraged. Malachi 2:15 describes it as: You belong to him in body and spirit. And what is God asking for? descendants of God. “

We don’t just get married for ourselves. We can marry fellow believers and together leave offspring for God and raise the next generation.

5. Sexual health

Can you be brutally honest? Some single adults date for the purpose of companionship. Others, for sex.

I heard about a man like that. When asked by his friends how the professing Christian could justify his late nights, he explained that it was for his “sexual health.” This kind of logic has no biblical backing. In fact, God commands quite the opposite. “But we cannot say that our bodies were made for sexual immorality. They were made for the Lord, and He cares about our bodies.”1 Corinthians 6:13NLT).

God designed sex to take place only within marriage (1 Corinthians 7:2). Anything that violates God’s perfect standard will cause future heartache. Because the word of God has the function of protecting us (Psalm 81:14).

If you find it hard to be single and single, remember how Jesus roamed the earth in a male body while maintaining sexual purity. Ask God for the secret.Also, please re-read the last 1 Corinthians 6:13, the scripture we passed by a few paragraphs ago. The Lord cares for your body. So pray for help to “control your body in a sacred and honorable way” (1 Thessalonians 4:4).

6. God Is Too Long

Maybe you’ve been looking for a compatible Christian, but you haven’t found one yet. Perhaps that dry wait (not to mention the long wait) is what drives you to date non-believers.

I know your patience is running out as time seems powerless to change your single status.

No one who hopes in God will be ashamed (Psalm 25:3). He hears your wishes for a spouse. Not only that, our merciful Father has a perfect memory. God remembers your needs and will get them done no matter how long it takes.

Habakkuk 2:3 “This vision is for the future. Use this verse to strengthen your resolve to never settle down, even if it feels like your God-given spouse will never arrive.

the only yes

Found it! I stand by everything we’ve discussed so far, but there’s a definite “yes” to the first question.

Is it okay to date non-believers? The only “yes” is if God says so.

But whether you can properly hear the voice of the Lord can be dealt with another time.

Photo credit: ©GettyImages/jacoblund

Doctor.Biography photo of Audrey David Heiseraudrey david heiser, PhD He is a California Chartered Psychologist, Internal Family System (IFS) Certified Therapist, IFSI Certified Clinical Consultant, and author. Surviving Difficult People: When Faith and Emotion Collide. After establishing and leading the Counseling Center at Her Dream Center in Los Angeles, she now devotes herself to practice for survivors of trauma, including emotional abuse.visit her in www.aimforbreakthrough.com and Instagram @DrAudreyD.

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