In an interesting paradox, heterosexual single men are lonelier than ever, and heterosexual single women are happier than their male counterparts.
Women are no longer calm.
Psychologist Greg Matos caused a stir on social media last month. The Rise of Lonely Single Men A big factor is that women have higher dating standards. Here are some of Dr. Matos’ findings:
- As relationship standards rise, dating opportunities for heterosexual men are declining.
- young middle-aged men the loneliest they have been for generations
Most people welcomed the idea that women would ultimately stand for equitable relationships, but for select men it was a hard pill to swallow. YouTube videos Shining Light on Emotions:
“Women are delusional by their own standards.”
“Ladies, enjoy the Crazy Cat Ready Starter Kit.”
“Women like her still complain…”
Triggered by the idea that women are raising their standards, many men can no longer tolerate poor communication skills and emotional helplessness. Do you have any suggestions to work for? Crazy! Delusion!
I’m surprised so many people are getting so defensive (don’t shoot messengers – we’re sharing data). tick tock When Instagram likewise.
Women aren’t demanding that men make more money or look better, they demand that men improve their relationship skills. It’s news. Because you can learn and develop relationship skills that are different than superficial things like looks, height, and wealth. The best part – it’s free!
If you’re a man who wants to have a real relationship, you need to invest some in your relationship skills.
Practice constructive communication
Are the conversations escalating? Have you found yourself becoming defensive or passive-aggressive? Try Nonviolent Communication (NVC) methods.
Developed by Dr. Marshall Rosenberg, NVC is a framework that helps you communicate with empathy and connection, helping you move the conversation forward instead of repeating it in circles.
Use a four-step process of observation, identifying emotions, identifying needs, and articulating requests.
- Observe the facts without judgment. State facts, not your interpretations or assumptions.for example My event on Saturday started at 2pm and I sent two reminders to arrive on time.
- Use the word “I” to describe how you feel. for example, It was an important event, so I was sad that I couldn’t come on time.
- Consider an unmet need. Emotions such as anger and sadness reveal unmet needs such as love, acceptance, and connection.
- Please make a clear request. Express a specific, actionable request. You are not making a request, you are stating a preference. Don’t be vague.Excluding that “Think more!” you can say, “Could you go with me to the event on Thursday and get there 15 minutes early?”
There are many tools you can learn to develop your relationship skills. Don’t be ashamed of your starting point. They didn’t teach us this stuff in school. We learned how to dissect a frog before learning how to touch and express emotions and utilize healthy coping mechanisms.
Developing these skills isn’t just for women, it’s for yourself too. If you choose to put in the effort, you can definitely do it.
The question is whether you will meet the challenge.